I couldn't let this day go by without writing to you Lara. It seems I mark my days with thoughts of you. You are the last image on my mind as I drift off to sleep and the first conscious thought that appears as I wake. The day is punctuated with your memory, even the simplest of things we both enjoyed make me remember: a glass of white wine or those cool "Rocket Dog" clogs.
The only productive things I've been able to accomplish these last two weeks also ironically remind me of you. The completion of my garden. Tending and planting beautiful things offered some solace. You would have been the first person I called to come see it. You would have been delighted in this garden of mine. Then, the acceptance of my article to the journal, "Restoration Ecology". I would have emailed you right away to give you the news and you would have delighted in this too. Lara it seems you are on my mind in everything I do. Every time I turn around, there you are again. I didn't' realize how many ways you had penetrated my world.
You were to arrive home from Alaska yesterday May 6th, the day before your birthday. I was super psyched for you to come home so you could catch me up on your latest set of adventures and mischief. And I could have calmed your nerves about things that were weighing heavy on your mind in the weeks prior to your trip. As always, you had way too much to do and not nearly enough time to do it. You called me crying the morning you left for Alaska. And you said, "I need help". I was lucky to be there when you needed it. And upon your return we had plans to meet straight away, you would have looked to me for the update and I would have proudly reported "no worries girlfriend". And then you would have given me that kick ass smile and a big huge hug and I would have felt on top of the world. But this story didn't' end that way.
Today, May 7th, is your birthday and of course you are on my mind. Tonight we will gather at the house, the house you shared with your beloved Chad, the house where your grandma lived. We will circle up the wagons around the ones dearest to you: Chadcito, the "old man" and Lippy too. The old man said, "we're not gonna just stand around crying all night are we?" Of course that gave me a good laugh. I'm sure you would have agreed with your dad on that one. "Enough fussing people, have some fun". So at the old man's request, and in honor of you we'll make sure to have a good time and share some laughs. I'll be sure to supply a bottle of white wine for your dad, a riesling b/c we know he prefers it sweet over dry. And we will of course giggle when Chad fires up the old bbq and busts out his little grill timer so he can be sure things are grilled to utter perfection. Chad will of course proudly tell us for the millionth time that he can set that thing to time up to 4 things at once. That timer shtick chad has going has always been good for a laugh hey? And Chad's freshly baked cookies are of course in order. Out of nowhere Chadcito will unveil the fancy shmancy mixer out of it's own custom built appliance cabinet designed especially for this purpose. The magical mixer cabinet devoted solely to the famous home baked cookies is always a crowd pleaser. And of course, there will be no lack of scratching and hugging for Chavez tonight. So you see girl, not to worry we will take care of your boys both tonight and beyond.
On this day, May 7th, 1970 the Beatles released their last single as a group, "The Long & Winding Road". This song marks the end of greatness, the breakup of a revolutionary group in music history. The lyrics speak to love lost but not forgotten. It seemed to resonate with me as a way of honoring you on this day of your birth. I leave these lyrics with you my friend. Love you always ~ Lauren
The long and winding road
That leads to your door
Will never disappear
I've seen that road before
It always leads me here
leads me to your door.
The wild and windy night
That the rain washed away
Has left a pool of tears
Crying for the day.
Why leave me standing here?
Let me know the way.
Many times I've been alone
And many times I've cried,
Anyway you'll never know
The many ways I've tried.
But still they lead me back
To the long, winding road
You left me standing here
A long, long time ago
Don't leave me waiting here
Lead me to your door.
But still they lead me back
To the long winding road
You left me standing here
A long, long time ago (ohhh)
Don't keep me waiting here
Lead me to your door.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah...
The Long and Winding Road ~
The Beatles, May 7th, 1970
Showing posts with label Lauren Mollot. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lauren Mollot. Show all posts
Monday, May 7, 2007
Friday, April 27, 2007
The most amazingly bad ass supah fly smarty pants hip mamacita in the world!!
It is amazing to me how well Lara’s spirit is being captured here by all her friends given that her character seemed to defy explanation. How does one even begin to describe the woman that Lara was? So many of you have conveyed the essence of who she was and yet she was so much more than any of us can express. I first met Lara 13 years ago shortly after moving to seattle. We both worked at gear shops and were in the same outdoor scene. Of course lara’s reputation always preceded her and I remember feeling somewhat enamored with her presence, intimidated even. But Lara had the keen ability to make everyone feel like they were special and worthy of her attention. Did that girl have a knack for conversation or what? She could draw out even the most introverted person, like Chad for instance, and open them up like a Dahlia. And boy did she draw people out. She drew them towards their greatest potential. Always encouraging her friends to be in hot pursuit of their dreams. She always had some anecdote to share about her life experience that allowed her to empathize with you. And she was full of one story after another that would keep you endlessly entertained and of course blow you away with both her insights and passion for life. Many of us thought, shit Lara how many lives have you lead in this one lifetime?
Lara was the master of balance, whether it was in the mountains, on her bike, in her relationships and professional world and in her life at large. She lived large. 10 lifetimes packed into one and she balanced it all with finesse. Like many of you have said she was an incredibly accomplished woman. I felt so honored to share many cross sections of life with Lara. Who knew that we would grow up and our lives would converge in so many ways. The gatherings she invited me to were always entertaining and full of great conversation and you were bound to meet some amazing people that circled within Lara’s social orbit. I shared experiences over the years with her in the mountains, we shared our academic careers, both attending the same program at the UW college of forest resources Professionally we were in the same field taking trips together to attend conferences and give talks. We would coach each other before giving talks and support each other when we felt nervous and insecure. She would always make me feel like I was the smartest person around when in fact she was the brilliant one, not me. She always made me feel like I meant the world to her and I’m sure I did, but so many people meant the world to Lara. She had cast her net wide and somehow managed to make time for everyone. On the flip side she was of course the most amazingly bad ass supah fly smarty pants hip mamacita any of us have ever known.
I want to echo what many of you have said about the many facets of Lara. That always blew me away. How could this bad ass super mama be such a girly girl. Sharing her advice on the latest lip gloss or the best hair product. And she was of course a super hip chick. She was down with the hip hop but at the same time could serve you up a glass of fine wine in a delicately etched glass. She was classic, sophisticated and a downright burly girly who could do it all with the best of them in every aspect of her life. And yet that girl was so modest; she was never satisfied with what she had accomplished because there was always something more on the horizon that she was pursuing. She was full of life, kinetic, never an idle moment. Her incredible sense of will and discipline was unparalleled; constantly and relentlessly pushing herself beyond her limits. Only when her body would finally rebel against her and collapse in an episodes of illness did she allow herself to stop for a minute. She was extreme even when she was down for the count.
When it came to tough times, Lara was always there for me and for so many others. Lara always pushed me to be strong and to be my best but she also made me feel safe when I was weak, vulnerable and sad. She is one of the very few people in this world that I could share that side of myself with. And in turn, she shared the same with me. It’s funny but I always felt such a huge sense of honor when Lara would cry with me or seek my help in some way. During those times, I felt a great satisfaction that such an amazing being would consider me someone she could be vulnerable with. When she allowed herself to lean on me I felt as if I had accomplished an important task in life, just by helping her in some way. It’s so hard for me to write these words because I wasn’t ready for her to disappear from my life. With each passing year our friendship grew deeper and stronger. She was one of the few people in my life that I knew I was going to grow old with. I was not ready for her to go and I had not prepared myself for the concept that she was nothing other than invincible. She was my girl. Lara I will miss you beyond words. For the rest of my mortal days you will truly be that most amazing woman I was so fortunate to know.
Missing you eternally,
Lauren Mollot
Lara was the master of balance, whether it was in the mountains, on her bike, in her relationships and professional world and in her life at large. She lived large. 10 lifetimes packed into one and she balanced it all with finesse. Like many of you have said she was an incredibly accomplished woman. I felt so honored to share many cross sections of life with Lara. Who knew that we would grow up and our lives would converge in so many ways. The gatherings she invited me to were always entertaining and full of great conversation and you were bound to meet some amazing people that circled within Lara’s social orbit. I shared experiences over the years with her in the mountains, we shared our academic careers, both attending the same program at the UW college of forest resources Professionally we were in the same field taking trips together to attend conferences and give talks. We would coach each other before giving talks and support each other when we felt nervous and insecure. She would always make me feel like I was the smartest person around when in fact she was the brilliant one, not me. She always made me feel like I meant the world to her and I’m sure I did, but so many people meant the world to Lara. She had cast her net wide and somehow managed to make time for everyone. On the flip side she was of course the most amazingly bad ass supah fly smarty pants hip mamacita any of us have ever known.
I want to echo what many of you have said about the many facets of Lara. That always blew me away. How could this bad ass super mama be such a girly girl. Sharing her advice on the latest lip gloss or the best hair product. And she was of course a super hip chick. She was down with the hip hop but at the same time could serve you up a glass of fine wine in a delicately etched glass. She was classic, sophisticated and a downright burly girly who could do it all with the best of them in every aspect of her life. And yet that girl was so modest; she was never satisfied with what she had accomplished because there was always something more on the horizon that she was pursuing. She was full of life, kinetic, never an idle moment. Her incredible sense of will and discipline was unparalleled; constantly and relentlessly pushing herself beyond her limits. Only when her body would finally rebel against her and collapse in an episodes of illness did she allow herself to stop for a minute. She was extreme even when she was down for the count.
When it came to tough times, Lara was always there for me and for so many others. Lara always pushed me to be strong and to be my best but she also made me feel safe when I was weak, vulnerable and sad. She is one of the very few people in this world that I could share that side of myself with. And in turn, she shared the same with me. It’s funny but I always felt such a huge sense of honor when Lara would cry with me or seek my help in some way. During those times, I felt a great satisfaction that such an amazing being would consider me someone she could be vulnerable with. When she allowed herself to lean on me I felt as if I had accomplished an important task in life, just by helping her in some way. It’s so hard for me to write these words because I wasn’t ready for her to disappear from my life. With each passing year our friendship grew deeper and stronger. She was one of the few people in my life that I knew I was going to grow old with. I was not ready for her to go and I had not prepared myself for the concept that she was nothing other than invincible. She was my girl. Lara I will miss you beyond words. For the rest of my mortal days you will truly be that most amazing woman I was so fortunate to know.
Missing you eternally,
Lauren Mollot
